Parish update

I feel that I am a little behind Emma in keping you informed of what is going on in the life of the parish. I am glad to say that things have picked up and although there are still times when we are not sure why we are here there are now plenty of occasions when it seems we are making some kind of impact. It has been slow coming but that is the way things happen here.

So the two Bishops came and went (see Blog ) and there was a chance of what seemed to be peace breaking out. Two funerals the next Saturday (one at 8am and the other at 10am) meant that the week of Emma's birthday and her sisters' visit was also time when the homes of the deceased had to be visited almost daily for prayers and a requiem mass held on the Friday evening. One of the people who died was a old lady to whom we had been taking Communion every week. She was a staunch Anglican, often winning the award for the most money raised at the annual bazaar, and it was quite beautiful that only a fw minutes after we had anointed her she died peacefully at the age of 92. We had a good funeral for her with the Mothers Union in full force. But this was followed by the funeral of someone called Paul, who was only 39 and had a wife and two children. Paul was a police officer and a member of the church council so this was a huge occasion. He had had emergency surgery on a stomach problem but then died of a heart attack. All a little mysterious but I guess we shall never know the exact circumstances of his death. Paul was a delightful man, quiet and humble, and it is a big tragedy for his wife and family. The funeral was enormous with hundreds packing the church and many more outside. The local police force came to make it a semi-military occasion but the police chaplain was very understanding and cooperated well with us at St. Thomas. So that was quite an occasion and gave us another inside look at how they do “death” in South Africa. Part of me feels that they have it better than us with our uptight and sterile type of crematorium services.

Sunday the 13^th was the day of our Parish vestry meeting (or as we call it the Annual Parish Church Meeting). This was to take place within the Parish Eucharist instead of a sermon. There were reports from Fr. Joseph, a churchwarden and the treasurer. All these seemed to go on for ages. It did not help us that they were all in Afrikaans (our abiding problem!). Following that there was some quite heated discussion about a number of things before we had the elections. This seemed chaotic but eventually the meeting succeeded in electing its churchwardens and council for this year. But it all took a very long time and having started at 8am the service did not end until way after 11am. All this time several young children and even teenagers sat through it all. I cannot believe that would happen in our churches. So we have one new churchwarden and several new members of the council and it feels a little as though the younger members of the congregation are getting a little impatient with their elders who seem to have a long history of in-fighting. Whether that is true or not I do not know but we hope for a more cohesive working unit.

We had three more visitors on Monday (14^th) and Tuesday (15^th). Charlotte Bannister-Parker who is the Bishop of Oxford's Officer for Foreign Programmes came with the Diocesan Communications Director, Sarah Meyrick and Sarah's daughter Imogen, who is doing part of her gap year teaching at St. Cyprian's School in Kimberley. It was a great visit and it was a delight having them. Charlotte filled us in with what is happening in others parts of the K and K diocese and how certain projects that have Oxford diocesan input are proceeding... or not. It was fortuitious that as we were sitting out under our vine sipping gin and tonic, first Fr. Joseph and then Eugene (churchwarden) arrived and we had a most helpful and enlightening discussion which helped fill in for us some of the background to our visit. It would be wrong to report what was said but it was very useful for us all in getting the full picture. Perhaps Sarah will write something about it in the Door (Oxford Diocesan magazine).

Today we had another bit of a breakthrough. During our talks with Lian, the lovely person who runs the Foetal Alcohol Syndrome unit, she said that she wanted to get the clergy of De Aar together to see whether she could get some support from the churches. She and I invited some of the clergy to a meeting and that happened this morning (Friday 18^th). It was a great success with about seven clergy present and we agreed to meet again in March. No such thing as a Churches Together in De Aar and the clergy never meet. This is typical of how much this town is behind the times. All the clergy thought that it was a good idea to meet together regularly so perhaps I have started something that will really benefit the town. There are so many problems that face De Aar and its people that the churches really do need to get their act together and start supporting those who are trying to make it a better place.

The Pink House

I promised to write a bit more about the sisters' stay as some interesting contacts were made which we hope to take into the future weeks. One involves the Pink House which we see in the distance across some rough ground from our house. It is unusual not so much for its smart pink paint as for being a two storey house in a grassy area near the railway land. Its proper name is the Joan Wertheim House, often referred to as FASS, meaning Foetal Alchol Spectrum Syndrome. We have looked at it from the outside but it was always shut and for many weeks over the holidays nothing was happening there.

Our contact at the Rotary Club in De Aar invited us to come along to the house to meet an American Episcopalian and Rotarian, Jonathan Warner. He was visitng to fund a training programme to encourage community workers in their undertanding of alcohol abuse which is very widespread here.Jonathan is an interesting man with a great passion for South Africa. We knew his name from the Anglican Church at Richmond as along with many other ventures in this town he has helped them through a charity called "Hope in South Africa" (see "hopeinsouthafrica.com"). We found Jonathan to be a kindred spirit (Anglican, Rotarian, love of South Africa etc.) and hope that through this chance meeting we might be able to form a link that will prove beneficial to all concerned.

Along with Sarah, Nicola and Sophie, we were invited to be present at a meeting between some Rotarians and the person called Lian who runs the Pink House. She will provide the training over a 3 day period in March for community leaders in De Aar, Richmond and Colesberg, as part of a programme designed to take the message about the dangers of drinking during pregnancy and breastfeeding to the target audience of young women across the social spectrum. It was fascinating to listen in and learn about the work being done as well as to hear how the levels of damage by alcohol to newborn babies has declined significantly since the work here began. FARR is the Foundation for Alchol Related Research, based in Cape Town, and De Aar was chosen as the levels of drinking have been found to be higher here than even in a wine-growing area such as Upington.

The day to day work of the house involves bringing pregnant women there once a month, following them up after they have checked into the usual clinics. The message not to drink is put over and they are given a meal and some counselling. Lian has two assistants but has lost one who had a driving licence so she spends up to four hours a day ferrying the women there and back. Today Alastair signed up to assist with driving and I had my first afternoon session playing with children who come in after school because they are hungry and know there is a meal waiting. Then they have an hour's play and I was able to play things like picture dominoes with small groups of children. Little language is required. I was surprised how well quite small girls were at counting and simple phrases in english. They seemed to enjoy our games and I certainly did, as contact with small people is something I have missed a lot. Contact with anyone, really!

Of course what we hope to do is to interest one or two people in our church community to do it with us or at least take over helping when we leave. At the moment there seems to be no link in spite of being so close to us. One lovely couple here used to be involved in the early days of the House but have moved on.

On Friday there is to be a meeting with as many of the mainstream church leaders as Lian and Tom between them can contact. There is no such things as Churches Together in De Aar that we can discern and Lian wants to impress on church leaders the importance of trying to support young women in abstaining from alcohol. For heavy drinkers it is not an easy thing. Interestingly she has said it is easy to get the message over and women are keen to try; churches are about the only place they might get support in their efforts. Lian spoke of the common feeling of hopelessness in De Aar, very much to do with unemployment and a decline in the town's economy as the railway system collapsed.

Another thing we sisters did last week was to make contact with someone on a tourist leaflet, described as a maker of musical instruments.and African drums. Sam Mooi met us at a tin shack workshop in Nonzwakazi, the black area on the edge of De Aar. Using recycled materials he makes marimbas or more strictly karimbas, which interested Nicola as she has a grand-daughter who plays the marimba in Germany. Sam cunningly used wood from a cable drum or the struts from a bed base. His drum sticks were the rubber from car shock absorbers fixed on an old chair leg or plastic toothbrush! He was a delightful character, very keen to explain and gently demonstrate drumming to tradtional songs from his Khosa background, as well as to explain his family's and the town's history. Since the only book we have so far found is in Afrikaans I found this very helpful.Sophie proudly left with a sizeable karimba to take back to Joburg for Bongani, despite the fact that the others were doubtful they would all fit in their little hire car.

So their visit combined some lovely times together, with enjoyment of the natural environment as well as social opportunities. And of course the big treat was having them here for my birthday which made it a very happy day. They did all the catering and we celebrated with a swim and dinner at the Trans-Karoo Lodge in Britstown. We all slept there and in the morning they drove off north to Kimberley and Johannesburg and we returned home. My fragile state was helped by finding lovely things waiting in our PO Box. Thank you.

Sisters to stay

Last Friday my 3 other sisters, Sarah, Nicola and Sohpie came for a 6 day visit, Alice having been here in December. What a lucky person to have sisters who care enough to come all this way for my birthday! Sophie has her daughter Lucy living in Joburg so she likes to come out twice a year and Sarah and Nicola took little persuading. None knew the Karoo and found it as beautiful and captivating as we do.

They arrived during a deluge of what the papers say was 60mm or 2.4inches of rain falling in an hour and more rain continued to fall that day and much of the next. They wondered if they were going to get any sunshine at all, surely one reason for coming to SA in February. Fortunately they did but the one swim in our olympic sized pool was during a bit of a sand storm, in cloud and distinctly chilly.

Rainwater round our house as the sisters arrive in the semi-arid Karoo

On Saturday a parish fund-raising braai was held and since the yard was ankle deep in mud, and rain fell much of the afternoon, the fire was lit under our porch between the kitchen and the garage. This made for plenty of chance for interesting chat between us all and those doing the cooking, but also involved some intrusion into our small kitchen where we 4 sisters and Tom were trying to make potato salad for 80, Tom having volunteered it. Since we had also just finished feeding two bishops, more of which from Tom later, it was a bit fraught shall we say and gave me reason to say roll on proper retirement! Food was put into polystyrene boxes and collected by those who had bought tickets, a practice that often happens, which was just as well given the drenching rain and mud. We sat round our dining room table eating our Karoo lamb, sausage and potato and pasta salads and later restored ourselves with whiskies!

As well as the fun of being together preparing meals and relaxing, we had some great outings seeing some very special birds and beasts. Four blue cranes were strutting around in the tall, bright green karoo grasses, in easy viewing distance with binoculars; ditto a lone bustard (Ludwigs bustard we think), many flamingos in a shallow lake, Egyptian geese, and lots of storks. On another day we saw no birds of significance, couldn't get entry into a nature reserve because the roads had been rain-damaged, but saw many different kinds of buck and baboons from the ordinary roads.

We usually get out of the car and look for some time with binoculars as the roads are so empty that is not a problem. The big Vanderkloof dam we visited again was this time a muddy brown as it is now bringing down silt from surrounding mountains.

Up on the hill above De Aar

More to follow about the rest of the week.

Tom writes : In the last blog I said that we were preparing for the Bishop's visit. I surmised that he might be coming to talk about the future of the parish. Nobody had told me why he was coming but it quickly transpired that my guess was wide of the mark. The reason for his visitation was to try and clear up a rather acrimonious dispute that unknown to us had been going on between two of the leaders of the parish. It would be unwise of me to say much more as this is a public forum but one of them was my colleague so it was good that I should be around to lend support. Not that I wanted to take sides and I certainly think there was wrong on both sides but as I need to work with Fr. Joseph then it is good that he sees me as a friend. The Bishop brought along Bishop Patrick, a retired bishop with a wealth of experience in dealing with reconciliation, and he skillfully guided us through the morning's discussions. In the end we believe that the difficulty had been resolved and I was asked to say so in my sermon during the next morning's Eucharist. It certinly seemed to lighten the atmosphere in church and the morning's service was the best piece of worship we have experienced here. Let us hope it continues this way.

The Big Hole

Last Saturday we needed to be in Kimberley for a Diocesan Council and decided to travel the 3 hour journey the day before rather than leave at 6am for a long day. This gave us a chance to have a good look at the Big Hole museum, newly finished as a modern tourist venue. The hole itself was dug mainly in the 1880s, by hand, by those desperate enough for the chance of finding a diamond and the wealth it might give them to withstand the fierce heat and the terrible conditions. The resulting hole is half a km wide and 800m deep! A platform allows one to stand more or less over it and wonder at how thousands of men could have risked their lives to achieve this. Water fills much of it and shines a deep blue. It was hand dug up to a depth of 240m and then shafts were used to dig to a depth of 800m. It was closed by De Beer in 1914 though some resifting has gone on in recent year to obtain further finds.

For size compare with the tower blocks beyond!

In the early years individuals came from around the world, as to the various gold rushes, but the later workforce largely consisted of local tribespeople desperate for money to take home, who were kept in appalling living conditions and subjected to great ignominy to avoid diamonds being smuggled out.

A lift takes one underground, as if for a great depth to see the shaft where explosives were used to loosen the rock. And excellent display boards and a film give historical and geological information. Surrounding buildings evoke the Victorian streets with their offices and shops.

Driving through Kimberley and visiting the shopping malls made us realise just how limited De Aar is in size and in choice. But the only things we bought that we haven't found here is houmous and some couscous! We stayed overnight with Sue and Richard Booys who were in a rented garage annexe, eating a lovely supper out in the garden. We realise how we miss a private garden and furniture that can be left out – we make do with two folding deck chairs that have to be brought in, to have the occasional evening drink outside but our evenings tend to revolve around trying to cook on our very frustrating electric cooker, watch an english language SAfrican news at 7pm and eating at our table. Mosquitoes are a current problem with all the rainfall providing pools of stagnant water. But Alastair is a dab hand at cooking on a braai and so we sometimes build a low BBQ on bricks, using an old metal grid. A couple of concrete blocks provide a space for a tray. With the sisters about to arrive we must develop something a bit more civilised!

My veg plot is providing good pickings of beans, courgettes and rocket and the kids have largely forgotten about the grapes now they are hard to find or reach.

Alastair has made good progress with the project to compile a history of the parish, visitng people to find out their memories and being taken to the archives in town such as they are – mainly architectural plans including our church. He now has a timeline which he hopes to use to prompt people's memories.

Progress too has been made in cleaning out the little empty house next to ours which the Sunday School want to use. The bathroom defied belief but now is at least clean, has a new toilet seat which hopefully won't be broken or stolen, as have many of the old tiles on the walls. There is an old black bath and stained basin but vinegar and bleach have both plyed a part in improving them. The electric wires and plugs have gone since the days when it was home to assistant priests, and so have all the carpets so we need donations of carpet from churchmembers if possible. We have found curtains and benches so it is just usable as a space.

Last year a free playgroup was using the house, for free in return for doing up the building. Some walls were painted but little else done and the tenancy was finished in November just before we arrived. The Sunday School teachers kept finding the rooms dirty and messy. A delightful young woman came to retrieve the cooking equipment, bedding, carpets and some toys belonging to social services and she told us that 3 adults looked after anything up to 55 children from 3 months to 5 years from 8am to midday. In winter the children were kept warm using the blankets.They now have a more suitable property which they are doing up ready to reopen. The need is great. Needless to say we were appalled by the conditions they had been glad to use.

Tom writes: Gradually from the inertia of the holiday period, parish life is beginning to pick up. People here are great at making plans but not so good at executing them. So there continues to be that frustration that comes from being culturally a western european and expecting everything to be highly efficient. However things are happening and church life is starting to pick up with Sunday school and church groups re-starting after the break and I have begun to take a Bible Study on a Tuesday evening (5.30p.m. - 6.30p.m.). This does not involve many people but it seems worthwhile. For a theme we have been using a phrase that the Bishop has on his letter-heading 'Proudly Anglican'. I have been trying to ask what that means with reference to some passages from the Acts of the Apostles and some thoughts of my own on why it is a good thing to be 'Proudly Anglican' in this country.

Sadly the times of the Bible Study have clashed with the times of meetings of the local Rotary Club. I have being trying to get to one of their meetings but like so many othe things they have not met over the long holiday period. Emma went to their meeting this week and found a small group of mainly women who were very welcoming. They are all white but have a great concern for all the people of De Aar and are involved in many projects to help the under-privileged. I hope I can re-adjust my Bible Study so that I can get to their meetings. I am sure my friends at Thatcham Rotary will be pleased to hear that we have at least made contact with the club here (some will be sad though that I have yet to make it onto the local golf course!).

Some intriguing news is that the Bishop is coming to De Aar on Saturday morning for a meeting with the church council. I m not sure what the agenda is but my guess is that the council are putting pressure on the Bishop for some positive news about what will happen in May when we leave here. De Aar has been dealt a rough hand over the last few years with no priest staying for any length of time so they do deserve some more committed and experienced leadership in this parish. The problem for the Bishop is that there seems to be a shortage of priests per se and especially those willing to come and stay in De Aar. The attractions of life in other bigger towns like Kimberley, Upington and Mahikeng make it hard for people to come to De Aar. It will be an interesting meeting especially as Bishop Ossie was born and bred in this parish and many of his extended family still live and worship here – there are one or two on the church council!

So today we await the arrival of three of Emma's sisters (Sarah, Nicola and Sophie) and it will be lovely to have them with us. We will be able to celebrate Emma' birthday on February 9^th together which will be very special. We have been missing family and friends a great deal and if it does one thing this adventure will remind us of how precious our family and friends are to us. You are certainly not to be taken for granted!

We had hoped to add another photo of a wonderful sunset but the process is often difficult - last time I could add no photos. This time at least I have one!